My Mother-in-law Must Be The

It's Hard To Find A Negligee In My Size. I Wear A Junior Mister.

Think Of Me As A Sex Symbol For The Men Who Don't Give A Damn.

You've Got To Realize That When All Goes Well, And Everything Is Beautiful, You Have No Comedy. It's When Somebody Steps On The Bride's Train, Or Belches During The Ceremony That You've Got Comedy!

It Took Me Three Weeks To Stuff The Turkey. I Stuffed It Through The Beak.

Right From The Start My Parents Had Left Me To Fend For Myself. Apparently Unaware That I Was A Kid, They Invariably Treated Me Like An Adult, Perhaps Because They Themselves Were No Spring Chickens.