When I Go To A

I'm At An Age Where I Think More About Food Than I Do About Sex. Last Week I Put A Mirror Over My Dining Room Table.

Last Week I Told My Psychiatrist, 'i Keep Thinking About Suicide', And He Told Me From Now I Have To Pay In Advance.

I Once Dated A Girl That Was Wild. She Was So Wild That One Night She Gave Her Phone Number To The Mechanical Bull.

Dad Told Me To Stop Running In Circles, I Couldn't, So He Nailed Down My Other Foot!

I Went To A Fight The Other Night, And A Hockey Game Broke Out.