The Elephant Smoked Too Much.(explaining

It (the Double-clarinet In India) Was Primarily Used For Snake Charming, Since The Snake Would Do Almost Anything To Get The Indians To Stop Playing It.

What Soap Is To The Body, Laughter Is To The Soul. Laughter Is The Shortest Distance Between Two People.

I Learned To Play The Piano On My Mother's Knee - That Was Before We Got A Piano.

I Do Not Have A Single White Note On My Piano; My Elephant Smoked Too Much.

Santa Claus Has The Right Idea - Visit People Only Once A Year.