I Went To A Freak

I Know I'm Not Sexy. In High School I Was Voted Most Likely To Masturbate.

What A Dog I Got, He Found Out We Look Alike, So He Killed Himself.

I Told My Wife A Man Is Like Wine, He Gets Better With Age. She Locked Me In The Cellar.

I Tell Ya When I Fly, I Don't Get No Respect. I Took One Of Those Cheap Flights, No Frills. I Finished Eatin' And Had To Do The Dishes.

Last Week I Told My Wife, If You Would Learn To Cook, I Could Fire The Chef. She Said, If You Could Learn To Make Love, I Could Fire The Chauffer.