I Drink Too Much. The

My Childhood Was Bad. No Father. Mother Was Greedy And Brought Me Up Awful - Never Made Me Breakfast Once. I Don't Want To Get Started. One Story Is Worse Than Another.

What A Kid I Got, I Told Him About The Birds And The Bee And He Told Me About The Butcher And My Wife.

My Wife Was Afraid Of The Dark. Then She Saw Me Naked, And Now She's Afraid Of The Light.

My Wife She's Fat. Why, If She Lost A Few Pounds, She'd Be Perfectly Round.

A Man In The Crowd Asks: Hey Rodney, How'd You Get Started? Rodney: I Was 12 Years Old, Alone In My Room, And I Got Started!