You're Not A Real Texan

Sure-fire Singles Ad: Famous Writer Needs Woman To Organize His Life And Spend His Money. Loves To Turn Off Sunday Football And Go To The Botanical Gardens With That Special Someone. Will Obtain Plastic Surgery If Necessary.

You're Not A Real Texan Till You've Been Kicked Out Of Every Decent State In America.

Apparently We Love Our Own Cell Phones But We Hate Everyone Else's.

The Best Ally You Can Have In Breaking Up A Street Fight Is A Grandmother.

If You Hate What You're Seeing, You Call It Sex And Violence. If You Like It, You Call It "romance And Adventure."