List Of 440+ Drunk Quotes

I Was Never In The Office [of Rolling Stone]. It Was Very Different From Lampoon, Where We Spent A Lot Of Time Together Socially, Which Is To Say "drunk."

Most Of Us Had Never Seen A Sober Redneck Before, And We Have The Reagan Landslide To Testify That None Of Us Ever Wants To See One Again. It Was A Horrifying Apparition. And Ever Since Jimmy Carter, All Of Us Rednecks Have Had To Be Very Careful To Be Drunk Rednecks Lest We Turn Into Some Kind Of Awful Creature With Big Buck Teeth And A State Department Full Of Human-rights Yahoos.

Ann Coulter To Me Is Someone Who Says Things That I Say All The Time, But I Say Them At Three In The Morning When I'm Drunk As A Monkey. She Says Them At Three In The Afternoon Stone Sober In Bright Daylight.

I Would Like To Apologize For Referring To George W. Bush As A 'deserter.' What I Meant To Say Is That George W. Bush Is A Deserter, An Election Thief, A Drunk Driver, A Wmd Liar, And A Functional Illiterate. And He Poops His Pants.

It Is Sometimes Necessary For Each Person. Fill Up With Delicious Food, Get Drunk, Sing Loudly And Chat Frivolously.

She's So Obnoxious. Like A Whole Saturday Night Drunk Tank Full Of Obnoxious Packed Into One Little Body." Detective Cavuto

Don't Drive Drunk. Ever. Don't Shag Anyone You Don't Like, Or Who Doesn't Like You. Get A Look At How People Live In A Place Where You Don't. Suffering Is Over-rated, Don't Pursue It. Ask For Help When You Need It, Don't When You Don't, And Learn To Recognize The Difference. Don't Confuse Movement And Progress. Be Kind. Be Forgiving. Pay Attention.

If A Man Gets Drunk And Goes Out And Breaks His Leg So That It Must Be Amputated, God Will Forgive Him If He Asks It, But He Will Have To Hop Around On One Leg All His Life.

I Am Simply A Book Drunkard.

Important People Are Much More Interesting When They Are Drunk And Seem Much More Like Human Beings.

Getting Drunk . . . You're In Complete Control Up To A Point. It's Your Choice, Every Time You Take A Sip. You Have A Lot Of Small Choices. It's Like . . . I Guess It's The Difference Between Suicide And Slow Capitulation . . .

Being Drunk Is A Good Disguise. I Drink So I Can Talk To Assholes. This Includes Me.