You Might Be A Redneck

You Might Be A Redneck If When You Leave Your House, You Are Followed By Federal Agents Of The Bureau Of Alcohol Tobacco And Firearms, And The Only Thing You Worry About Is If You Can Lose Them Or Not.

You Might Be A Redneck If Your Local Ambulance Has A Trailer Hitch.

In My Life, I Have Driven Some Crappy Vehicles. But I Have Never Been So Desperate For A Vehicle That I Wanted A Used Rental Car.

I Say, If Everybody In This House Lives Where It's God First, Friends And Family Second And You Third, We Won't Ever Have An Argument.

Whatever Cleaning Goes On On The Planet, Women Do 99% Of It. But See, Women Are Not As Proud Of Their 99% As Men Are Of Our One! We Clean Something Up, We're Gonna Talk About It All Year Long. It Might Be On The News, You Don't Know. A Woman Could Be Out Re-paving The Driveway. Men Actually Have Enough Gall To Run Out On The Porch And Go "hey Baby? Man, It's Hot As Hell Out Here, Ain't It! Look, Don't Worry About Emptyin' That Ashtray In The Den, I Done Got It, All Right? Did It For You, Sweet Pea. I'm Gonna Go Take A Nap Now, All Right?"