They Say That Nero Started

Clarinets, Like Lawyers, Have Cases, Mouthpieces, And They Need A Constant Supply Of Hot Air In Order To Function.

How Nice. Now The Germans Can Sleep In Peace, Knowing That They Will Not Be Invaded By Us.

If I Have Caused Just One Person To Wipe Away A Tear Of Laughter, That's My Reward.

Did You Know That Mozart Had No Arms And No Legs? I've Seen Statues Of Him On People's Pianos.

(responding To A Sneeze From The Audience) Who Exploded?