My Main Success Was An

I Have No Idea What I'm Going To Say When I Stand Up To Give A Toast. But I Do Know That Anything I Say I Find Funny.

I Always Rib People, But Nobody Ever Gives Me A Hard Time. I Don't Know Why. Maybe They're Afraid Of What I Might Say. There's Probably A Lesson In That Somewhere, But I Don't Know What It Is.

Alan King, A Comedian I Adored, Was Considered Society, And I Was Considered The Jewish Kid From The Neighborhood.

I Don't Feel An Obligation To Give Everyone A Hard Time, But When They're Important People, It's Fun.

What I Do Is, I Make Fun Of People And I Make Fun Of Myself And Things Around Us And Exaggerate Things. And I'm Never Mean-spirited. See, The Word Insult Means Some Guy Who's A Real Unkind Human Being. But I Don't Do That, Because Otherwise I Wouldn't Be Headlining All These Years, Thank God, And All These People Showing Up To See Me.