My Dad's Like, If Your

The Other Day My Twelve-year-old Says To Me, I Don't Feel Like I'm With You Right Now. You're In The Car With Me, You're Checking Your E-mail, You're Not Listening To Me, I Don't Feel Like I'm With You. And I Say, You Know What? That Was Your Mother's Gripe, Too. And She Was Right. And You're Also Correct. When You Cop To Something, You Get To The Next Level. In This Case, The Next Level Is: I Just Learned Something From My Twelve-year-old.

All I've Ever Done Is Try To Entertain My Way Through A Life That Often Has A Huge Amount Of Heaviness In It.

Just Went To The Gym And Worked On Every Body Part. Four People Slapped Me.

Around Comics, I've Always Been Known For, Oh, That's Not Dirty, This Is Dirty.

I Just Had A Pedicure. My Feet Are Soft Like A Baby's Behind. If His Ass Was Covered In Calluses.