Most Of My Jokes Are

Men Only Go For Skinny Women Because They're Too Weak To Argue - And Salads Are Cheap.

My Wife Said To Me: 'if You Won The Lottery, Would You Still Love Me?' I Said: 'of Course I Would. I'd Miss You, But I'd Still Love You.'

This Is Frank Carson, News At Ten, Sober.

People In Northern Ireland Vote For Their Church, They Don't Vote With Their Heads; It Is Ridiculous.

A Man Was Found Dead Covered In Sprinkles, Strawberry Sauce And A Flake. Reports Said He May Have Topped Himself.