I've Given Up Reading Books.

My Last Picture For Warners Was Romance On The High Seas. It Was Doris Day's First Picture; That Was Before She Became A Virgin.

What The World Needs Is More Geniuses With Humility; There Are So Few Of Us Left.

I Never Watch The Dinah Shore Show- I'm A Diabetic.

You Can't Possibly Hear The Last Movement Of Beethoven's Seventh And Go Slow. (oscar Trying To Talk His Way Out Of A Speeding Ticket)

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I'm Schizophrenic, And So Am I.