If Criticism Had Any Power

All That The Comedian Has To Show For His Years Of Work And Aggravation Is The Echo Of Forgotten Laughter.

It Is Bad To Suppress Laughter. It Goes Back Down And Spreads To Your Hips.

An Actor's Popularity Is Fleeting. His Success Has The Life Expectancy Of A Small Boy Who Is About To Look Into A Gas Tank With A Lighted Match.

He Dreamed He Was Eating Shredded Wheat And Woke Up To Find The Mattress Half Gone.

My Agent Gets 10 Percent Of Everything I Get, Except The Blinding Headaches.