I Wouldn't Give My Troubles

The Cia Special Unit That Was Searching For Osama Bin Laden Has Been Disbanded. So I Guess, Mission Accomplished.

Congratulations Are In Order For Woody Allen - He And Soon Yi Have A Brand New Baby Daughter. It's All Part Of Woody's Plan To Grow His Own Wives.

Some Secret Service Guys Crashed A Car Into The White House. And They Had Been Drinking When It Happened. Actually, They Hit A Barrier Trying To Get To The White House. It's The Same Thing That Is Happening To Hillary.

Don't Kid Yourself. Global Warming Is No Joke. Here's How Serious Global Warming Has Gotten To Be In The United States. In This Country Global Warming Is So Bad, We Are Now Actually Starting To Warm Up To Barry Bonds.

Congratulations To Saddam Hussein On Being Elected To Another Seven-year Term. It Was Very Close. He Received 99 Percent Of The Vote, And One Percent Of The Vote Went For Last-minute Candidate Frank Lautenberg.