Them Bats Is Smart. They

I Hate Decaffeinated Coffee. It's Useless Brown Water.

Mitt Romney Looks Like A Guy Modeling Briefs On A Package Of Underwear ... He Looks Like A Guy Who Goes To The Restroom When The Check Comes ... He Looks Like A Guy Who Would Run A Seminar On Condo Flipping ... He Looks Like He Is The Closer At A Cadillac Dealership.... He Looks Like That Guy On The Golf Course In The Levitra Commercial.

The Issue Of Gay Marriage Has Reached The Supreme Court And Observers Are Analyzing Every Detail To Predict How Each Justice Will Vote. Experts Say Chief Justice John Roberts Is Likely To Rule In Favor Of Gay Marriage Based On The Fact That He Spent Tuesday's Hearings Watching The Tony Award Nominations.

The United States Has Launched Airstrikes Against Isis. It's Being Called 'operation Approval Ratings.'

Barack Obama Said He May Negotiate With The Taliban. A Lot Of People Are Saying Okay, But Be Careful. But I Said This Guy Has Experience Negotiating With The Enemy. For Gosh Sake, He Lives With His Mother-in-law, You Know.