I Stuck My Head Out

I Recently Had Double-bypass Surgery. As They Wheel You In, The Doctor Always Gives You A Last Look. You Know That Look. That Look Of Confidence To Make You Feel Good. I Always Say To Every Doctor, If I Don't Make It, I'll Never Know It.

I Shouldn't Tell Jokes About My Wife. She's Attached To A Machine That Keeps Her Alive... The Refrigerator.

Better To Keep Quiet And Let People Think You're An Idiot Than Speak Up And Confirm It.

I Bought A Perfect Second Car... A Tow Truck.

My Mother Used To Rock Me - And She Used Big Rocks.