I Asked My Wife, 'on

My Wife And I Have Olympic Sex. Once Every Four Years.

I Was So Ugly My Mother Used To Feed Me With A Sling Shot.

I Came From A Real Tough Neighborhood. Once A Guy Pulled A Knife On Me. I Knew He Wasn't A Professional, The Knife Had Butter On It.

I Went To A Gay Bar, They Wanted Proof Of Sex So I Showed Them, They Said It Wasn't Enough.

I'm A Bisexual; I Get It Maybe Twice A Year.