I Knew A Girl So

At Christmas Time We Couldn't Afford Tinsel, So We'd Wait Till Grandpa Sneezed.

...went To A Bar For A Few Drinks. The Bartender Asked What I Wanted. "surprise Me", I Said. So He Showed Me A Naked Picture Of My Wife.

In High School, When I Played Football I Got No Respect. I Shared A Locker With A Mop.

I Knew A Girl So Ugly, I Took Her To The Top Of The Empire State Building And Planes Started To Attack Her.

Comedy Is A Camouflage For Depression.