I Could Tell My Parents

I Have Nothing But Troubles With My Car. Every Sunday I Take My Family Out For A Push.

With My Old Man I Got No Respect. He Told Me Never Take Candy From A Stranger Unless He Offered Me A Ride.

I Was So Poor Growing Up...if I Wasn't A Boy...i'd Have Nothing To Play With.

I Tell Ya, Sex Is Getting Harder All The Time. Me And My Wife Were Trying To Have Sex For Hours Last Night And I Finally Gave Up. I Asked Her, "what, You Can't Think Of Anybody Either?"

I Was Making Love To This Girl And She Started Crying. I Said, "are You Going To Hate Yourself In The Morning?" She Said, "no, I Hate Myself Now."