He Who Laughs Last Didn't

I Have Three Kids, One Of Each.

My Dog Learned How To Beg By Watching Me Through The Bedroom Door.

My Wife Can't Cook At All. She Made Chocolate Mousse. An Antler Got Stuck In My Throat.

My Doctor Told Me To Watch My Drinking. Now I Drink In Front Of A Mirror.

I Remember I Was So Depressed I Was Going To Jump Out A Window On The Tenth Floor; They Sent A Priest Up To Talk To Me And He Said, ' On Your Mark...'