When I Was On Acid,

I Wish I Could Play Little League Now. I'd Be Way Better Than Before.

I've Never Been To A Hotel With A Rotating Restaurant On Top, But One Time I Took My Girlfriend To A Merry-go-round, And I Gave Her A Burrito.

An Escalator Can Never Break: It Can Only Become Stairs.

Xylophone Is Spelled With An X. That's Wrong. It Should Be A Z Up Front. Next Time You Spell Xylophone, Use A Z. If Someone Says, "that's Wrong!", You Say, "no, It Ain't." If You Think That's Wrong, Then You Need To Have Your Head Z-rayed.

I Haven't Slept For Ten Days, Because That Would Be Too Long.