I See My Face In

People Laugh To Forget Their Troubles, And To Forget Their Troubles They Like To Look At People Who Aren't Doing Better Than They Are.

But I Don't Want To Lose Touch With Things Like Eating In Bob's Big Boy.

If You're Wearing A Bluetooth Thing And You've Got That Thing On Your Belt, You Are Working For Somebody Else. You Are Not The Guy In Charge. That's A Really Good Social Status Indicator.

I Don't Know What People Are Going To Think Of My Stand-up. If You Only Know Me From 'the Price Is Right' And 'the Drew Carey Show,' Then You Might Be A Little Bit Shocked. I'm A Little Dirty And A Little Opinionated But All In Fun.

Look, This Is An Odd Question, But You're Kind Of Cute And You're Pretty Nice To Me. Are You Drunk? It's Ok If You Are.