We're A Heart Attack Away

You Might Be A Redneck If Your Anniversary Present Was Getting The Septic Tank Pumped.

You Might Be A Redneck If Your Local Ambulance Has A Trailer Hitch.

Please Don't Get Me Wrong Here. I'm Not Making Fun Of Old People. In Fact I Think That's The Goal Of Everybody Here Tonite. We All Want To Be An Old Person Someday.

Thank God I'm At That Point In My Career Where I Don't Have To Take Stuff That I Don't Really Want To Do.

You Might Be A Redneck If You've Ever Stolen Toilet Paper From A Public Restroom.