Well, I'm A 14 Handicap.

My Wife Gets All The Money I Make. I Just Get An Apple And Clean Clothes Every Morning.

Everyone Should Have Kids. They Are The Greatest Joy In The World. But They Are Also Terrorists. You'll Realize This As Soon As They Are Born And They Start Using Sleep Deprivation To Break You.

My Wife Said To Me 'i Hope You Win... But If You Do And You Go Up And Say You Love Me, Don't Think It Makes Up For Never Saying It When We're Alone.

I'm Now Unemployed. It's A Weird Feeling With No Work, But At Least There's Still Golf. Standup Comedy Is Like My Core, It's What I Do. But I Want To Be A Pro Golfer. It's A Love/hate Relationship With Golf. I Can Come Away Feeling So Serene, And Yet, It's The Thing That I Can Let Get To Me To Throw A Club And Say Curses That Don't Even Exist. I'm Obsessed With Something That Won't Let Me Master It. I Don't Know. I Need Therapy.

I Don't Want To Say Work Is Who I Am, But Some People Feel More Centered And More Whole When They're Producing And Creating.