There's A Reason You Never

When You See The Veins Popping Out Of My Neck, That's An Exclamation Point.

Seeing Your Mother Naked Is Not Something You Easily Recover From. Seeing Your Mother Naked And Jumping From One Side Of A King-sized Bed To The Other With A Nurse's Hat On While Your Father, Who Is Also Naked, Is Chasing Her With A Bandanna Around His Neck, Is Reason To Put Yourself Up For Adoption.

You Do Not Own A Dog. You Have A Dog. And The Dog Has You

Vomit And Feces Are Two Reason I Have Decided Not To Procreate.

I Think Reality Television, Unless It's Inspirational, Which It Very Rarely Is, I Think It's Embarrassing. It's Embarrassing State Of Affairs That We're In.