There's A Part Of Me

I'm Sure A Psychologist Would See Something Highly Significant In How Absent-minded I Am. I Mean I'd Forget My Head If It Wasn't Attached To My Neck By Muscles, Ligaments And My Esophagus.

However, My Problems With My Memory Are Further Complicated By The Fact That While I Don't Have Any Recollection Of Things I Have Actually Done, I Have Very Vivid Recollections Of Loads Of Things That I Haven't Done.

Dire Straits Is A Great Band. Someone Tells You They Like ""brothers In Arms"" And Immediately You Know They're A Stupid Annoying Git.

The Optimum Frequency With Which Comedians Should Do A Series Is Every Year. I Do One Every Three Years. My Audience Is Literally Dying Off.

As A Comic, You Try Something And If It Works You Go With It And Grind It To Death.