The Scots Are A Very

Thinking Up Jokes Is Easy. The Hard Part Is Trying Them Out On Stage, Because You Never Know If They're Funny Until You Get There. Not One Comedian In The World Ever Really Knows.

Probably The Toughest Time In Anyone's Life Is When You Have To Murder A Loved One Because They're The Devil.

You Should Get Married. When I Was Younger, I Was Into The Fame And Fortune, And Now I Realize That A Loving Wife And Happy Children - That's Life's Greatest Consolation Prize.

When I Was A Kid, My Favourite Time Of The Year When I Was Child Was That Magical First Snowfall. I'd Yell Yippee! Snow! And Run Up To The Front Door And Shout You Know The Deal... You Have To Let Me In Now.

Ambiguity — The Devil's Volleyball.