The Future Is Not What

I Just Want To Thank Everyone Who Made This Day Necessary.

I Couldn't Tell If The Streaker Was A Man Or A Woman Because It Had A Bag On It's Head.

It Ain't Like Football. You Can't Make Up No Trick Plays.

Never Answer An Anonymous Letter.

When The Waitress Asked If I Wanted My Pizza Cut Into Four Or Eight Slices, I Said, 'four. I Don't Think I Can Eat Eight.'