The Fellow That Agrees With

I'm Sorry To Inform You That Your 50 Year Warranty Has Expired On Your Back, Knees, And Memory. Luckily Your Lifetime Warranty On Your Heart Is Still In Effect. Of Course, That Becomes Void And Expires When You Do.

There Are Two Ways To Handle A Woman, And Nobody Knows Either Of Them.

A Grouch Escapes So Many Little Annoyances That It Almost Pays To Be One.

Only One Fellow In Ten Thousand Understands The Currency Question, And We Meet Him Every Day.

Women Seem To Be All Right On Bargains Till It Comes To Picking Out A Husband.