Sometimes I Get Really Lonely.

2-in-1 Is A Stupid Term, Because 1 Is Not Big Enough To Hold 2. That's Why 2 Was Created.

I'm Always On The Road, And I Drive Rental Cars. Sometimes I Don't Know What's Going On With The Car, And I'll Drive For Ten Miles With The Emergency Brake On. That Doesn't Say A Lot For Me, But It Doesn't Say A Lot For The Emergency Brake. What Kind Of Emergency Is This? I Need To Not Stop Now. It's Not Really An Emergency Brake, It's An Emergency Make-the-car-smell-funny Lever.

As A Comedian, You Have To Start The Show Strong And You Have To End The Show Strong. Those Are The Two Key Elements. You Can't Be Like Pancakes. You're All Happy At First, But Then By The End, You're Sick Of 'em.

I Did A Radio Interview; The Dj's First Question Was "who Are You?" I Had To Think. Is This Guy Really Deep, Or Did I Drive To The Wrong Station?

I'm Sick Of Soup Of The Day, Man. It's Time We Make A Decision. I Need To Know What Soup From Now On Is.