Some Say He Never Blinks,

I Therefore Have To Use The Force. And Weirdly, This Doesn't Work Very Well. I Don't Understand Why, Because On The Last Census, I Put My Religion Down As Jedi Knight.

Like Every Big Organisation These Days, The Bbc Is Obsessed With The Wellbeing Of Those Who Set Foot On Its Premises. Studios Must Display Warning Notices If There Is Real Glass On The Set, And The Other Day I Was Presented With A Booklet Explaining How To Use A Door. I Am Not Kidding.

I Mean Its A Weekly Occurrence That Somebody Will Complain That Top Gear Was On Last Night - And You Just Sit Back And Wait For The Complaints. But If You Start To Pay Attention To Everyones Concerns, You End Up With Something Bland And Boring. So You Sort Of Have To Ignore Everybody In Order To Do The Show How We Want To Do It.

If I Like Somebody Else's Tribe I'm Going To Promote The Hell Out Of It. The Whole Thing Is A Democracy, And If Somebody's More Popular Then Good Luck To Them.

Being Smarter Than You Look Is Better Than Looking Smarter Than You Are.