Some People Rely On Rumors

All I've Ever Done Is Try To Entertain My Way Through A Life That Often Has A Huge Amount Of Heaviness In It.

What I've Learned About Comedy People Is That They're Defined By The Harshest Level They've Been To, Their Personal Auschwitz.

Stop It, Stop Lighting Your Butthol On Fire, And Everybody Listen To Me. If You Light Your Ass On Fire, I Hope You Have Boxers Or A Filter Of Somekind, Because If Your A Bareass Person. Not A Lot Of People Have Done This. Stop It. This Is Why. You Can Cauterize Your Asshole Shut, So When You Fart It Has Nowhere To Go And You Can Have A Fart Attack.

Wise Men Say, Only Fools Rush In. Wise Men Are So Slow.

My Mom Just Told Me It's Impossible To Know What's Going To Happen In Life. Except With Breakfast, Cause She Eats The Same Thing Every Day.