She Was So Ugly That

Boy What A Hotel That Was, Why They Stole My Towel.

When I Was Born The Doctor Took One Look At My Face, Turned Me Over And Said, "look, Twins!"

My Father Gave Me A Bat For Christmas. The First Time I Tried To Play With It, It Flew Away.

I Tell Ya, My Wife, We Get Along Good Cause We Have Our Own Arrangement. I Mean, One Night A Week I Go Out With The Boys And One Night A Week, She Goes Out With The Boys.

You Live With Life's Disappointments And Learn From Them. At Seventy-eight, I Know It All.