I Told My Doctor I

I'm A Bisexual; I Get It Maybe Twice A Year.

It's Tough To Stay Married. My Wife Kisses The Dog On The Lips, Yet She Won't Drink From My Glass.

When I Was Born I Was So Ugly The Doctor Slapped My Mother.

I'm Tellin' Ya I Get No Respect. When I Was In Switzerland, I Got An Obscene Yodel.

I Feel Sorry For Short People, You Know. When It Rains, They're The Last To Know.