I Feel Sorry For Short

I Once Went Out With This Wild Girl. She Made French Toast And Got Her Tongue Caught In The Toaster.

I Was An Ugly Child. I Got Lost On The Beach. I Asked A Cop If He Could Find My Parents. He Said, 'i Don't Know. There's Lots Of Places For Them To Hide'.

I Shouldn't Tell Jokes About My Wife. She's Attached To A Machine That Keeps Her Alive... The Refrigerator.

They Change The Sheets Every Day... From One Bed To Another.

I'm A Downer. I've Been Depressed My Whole Life. Figure It Out.