She Was So Fat That

I Have Three Kids, One Of Each.

When I Was A Kid My Parents Moved A Lot, But I Always Found Them.

I Went To A Gay Bar, They Wanted Proof Of Sex So I Showed Them, They Said It Wasn't Enough.

A Hooker Once Told Me She Had A Headache.

When I Was Born ... The Doctor Came Out To The Waiting Room And Said To My Father ... I'm Very Sorry. We Did Everything We Could ... But He Pulled Through.