Recently, I've Ventured Into The

I Got A Letter From The Irs. Apparently I Owe Them $800. So I Sent Them A Letter Back. I Said, If You'll Remember, I Fastened My Return With A Paper Clip, Which According To Your Very Own Latest Government Pentagon Spending Figures Will More Than Make Up For The Difference.

Now There's A Seven-day Waiting Period To Buy A Gun. Who Can Stay Mad That Long?

I Once Had A Large Gay Following, But I Ducked Into An Alleyway And Lost Him.

I Took My Grandmother To The Emergency Room. The Doctor Said That She Was On An Artificial Life Support System, And That Although Her Brain Was Dead Her Heart Was Still Beating. I Though, "we've Never Had A Democrat In The Family Before".

Once I Posed Nude For A Magazine. I've Never Been Back To That Newstand.