Parenting Is A Negative Thing.

You Become About As Exciting As Your Food Blender. The Kids Come In, Look You In The Eye, And Ask If Anybody's Home.

I Got So Much Food Spit Back In My Face When My Kids Were Small, I Put Windshield Wipers On My Glasses.

I'm So Bored. I Went To The Food Locker Yesterday To Visit My Meat.

Written On Her Tombstone: "i Told You I Was Sick.

People Usually Survive Their Illnesses, But The Paper Work Eventually Does Them In. Filing A Claim For Insurance Is Terminal.