Number One, One, One On

Swimming Is Not A Sport. Swimming Is A Way To Keep From Drowning. That's Just Common Sense!

When He Got Loaded, The Human Cannonball Knew There Were Not Many Men Of His Caliber.

As You Swim The River Of Live, Do The Breast Stroke. It Helps To Clear The Turds From Your Path.

Comedy Is Grievances. It's A Recitation Of Grievances - Whether They're Inconsequential, Superficial - Like "my Wife Shops Too Much", Or "kids Today", All Those Old-fashioned Themes - Or, If It's Deeper, And Somewhat More Thoughtful, About Social Imbalance And Inequities, And The Folly Of Human Behavior. It's Usually A Complaint.

Save The Trees, Save The Bees, Save The Whales, Save Those Snails.