Nothing Is More Vintage Than

Last Night Was Super Tuesday - A 10-state Gop Primary Orgy. A Big, Sweaty Pile Of Lever-yankin Republican Voters. And Like Most Orgies, It Involves A Bunch Of Middle Aged Guys Who Are Not Appealing To Women.

Yes, President Romney Will Not Take God Off Our Coins. And That Is So Important Because Right Now, Just Like God, The Value Of Our Currency Really Has To Be Taken On Faith.

I Don't Know A Lot About Politics. I Like Talking About Human Behavior. Politicians Are Funny To Me Because They Often Say One Thing And Behave A Different Way.

You Have To Have A Passionate Opinion; Otherwise You Sound False. You End Up Telling The Audience Jokes They've Already Heard.

I Have Two Last Pieces Of Advice. First, Being Pre-approved For A Credit Card Does Not Mean You Have To Apply For It. And Lastly, The Best Career Advice I Can Give You Is To Get Your Own Tv Show. It Pays Well, The Hours Are Good, And You Are Famous. And Eventually Some Very Nice People Will Give You A Doctorate In Fine Arts For Doing Jack Squat.