My Secret For Staying Young

I Never Kick My Ball In The Rough Or Improve My Lie In A Sand Trap. For That I Have A Caddie.

Eighty Is When You Order A Steak And The Headwaiter Puts It Through The Blender. Or When You Wake Up As Many Times During The Night As Burt Reynolds, But Not For The Same Reason.

Whenever I Play With Him , I Usually Try To Make It A Foursome - The President, Myself, A Paramedic And A Faith Healer.

Foursomes Have Left The First Tee There And Have Never Been Seen Again. They Just Find Their Shoelaces And Bags.

Following His Doctor's Orders, Nikita (khrushchev) Has Cut His Drinking In Half. He's Leaving Out The Water.