Most Men Are Secretly Still

Women Take Clothing Much More Seriously Than Men. I've Never Seen A Man Walk Into A Party And Say "oh, My God, I'm So Embarrassed; Get Me Out Of Here. There's Another Man Wearing A Black Tuxedo.

Men Are Very Confident People. Even A Sixty-year-old Man With No Arms Thinks He Could Play In The Super Bowl If He Had To.

Buying Something On Sale Is A Very Special Feeling. In Fact, The Less I Pay For Something, The More It Is Worth To Me. I Have A Dress That I Paid So Little For That I Am Afraid To Wear It. I Could Spill Something On It, And Then How Would I Replace It For That Amount Of Money?

Men Who Consistently Leave The Toilet Seat Up Secretly Want Women To Get Up To Go The Bathroom In The Middle Of The Night And Fall In.

I Jogged For Three Miles Once. It Was The Worst Three Hours Of My Life.