Men Are Less Sentimental Than

I Have Been Doing Leg Lifts Faithfully For About Fifteen Years, And The Only Thing That Has Gotten Thinner Is The Carpet Where I Have Been Doing The Leg Lifts.

Someday I Want To Be Rich. Some People Get So Rich They Lose All Respect For Humanity. That's How Rich I Want To Be.

I Love To Shop After A Bad Relationship. I Don't Know. I Buy A New Outfit And It Makes Me Feel Better. It Just Does. Sometimes I See A Really Great Outfit, I'll Break Up With Someone On Purpose.

I Read Recipes The Same Way I Read Science Fiction. I Get To The End And Say To Myself "well, That's Not Going To Happen

I Wonder If Other Dogs Think Poodles Are Members Of A Weird Religious Cult.