Mail Your Packages Early So

He's So Fat, He Can Be His Own Running Mate.

I Get Sick Of That Old Rationalization, "we're Staying Together Because Of The Children." Kids Couldn't Be More Miserable Living With Parents Who Can't Stand Each Other. They're Far Better Off If There's An Honest, Clean Divorce.

I Hated My Last Boss. He Asked, Why Are You Two Hours Late? I Said, I Fell Downstairs. He Said, That Doesn't Take Two Hours.

It's The Lack Of This Kind Of Open And Honest Education About Sex That Causes So Many Kids To Grow Up With Sexual Hang-ups.

Never Use A Big Word When A Little Filthy One Will Do.