Like All Good Ruins, I

Your Husband Is Lazy If The Directions On His Medicine Say, "a Teaspoon Before Going To Bed," And In One Day He Uses Seven Bottles.

You Can Say The Nastiest Things About Yourself Without Offending Anyone.

If My Jeans Could Talk, They'd Plead For Mercy.

I'm At An Age When My Back Goes Out More Than I Do.

My Plastic Surgeon ... Said My Face Looked Like A Bouquet Of Elbows.