Life Is Very Tough. If

My Mother Was A Very Elegant Woman. When A Flying Saucer Landed On The Lawn, She Turned It Over To See If It Was Wedgwood.

That Baby Is So Ugly... I've Never Seen A Six-month-old So Desperately In Need Of A Wax.

Why Should I Cook For My Husband? So He Can Tell A Hooker I Make A Delicious Cake?

I Like Colonic Irrigation Because Sometimes You Find Old Jewelry.

Yeah, I Read History. But It Doesn't Make You Nice. Hitler Read History, Too.