I've Got A Friend Whose

When People Come Over To My House For Dinner, I Always Have A Vegetarian Option. They Can Make Do, Or They Can **** Off!

You Never Want To Be The Grumpy Guy, Although I Do Have Quite A Grumpy Face.

A Big Girl Once Came Up To Me After A Show And Said "i Think You're Fatist." I Said "no, No. I Think You're Fattest."

Once I Was Doing A Sponsored Walk. In The End I Managed To Raise So Much Money, I Could Afford A Taxi.

I Worry About My Nan. If She's Alone And Falls, Does She Make A Noise? I'm Joking, She's Dead.