It's Easy To Smile When

I'm Not Drunk Onstage, Although I've Done That A Couple Of Times When I Was Younger. It's Partly Just The Way I Talk - I Talk Like Somebody In A Rocking Chair. I'm Your 150-year-old Grandmother.

Men Look At Breasts The Way Women Look At Babies. 'aw, Isn't That Lovely?'

I Think Of Myself As A Theatre Comic Instead Of Club Comic Because I Tend To Talk For A Bit Before I Start Being Funny. I Don't Really Do The One-liners And Five Second Bits Or Whatever. But It's Good To Work Stuff Out Sometimes.

Idioms Are A Big Thing In Ireland. They Want To Fill The Time, To Show How Good They Are At Talk - It's A Talk-off

Religion Is The Yeast Of Death Cakes. It Is The Most Awful Agent On A Vulnerable Mind. It's The Refuge Of Alienated And Lonely People. It's What People Had Before Television. It Yokes People Together Into An Imaginary World. It Is Just People Talking To Their Imaginary Friends, At Length. I Wouldn't Mind, But Some Of The People Are World Leaders.