It Is Pretty Hard To

Honesty Pays, But It Doesn't Seem To Pay Enough To Suit Some People.

It Don't Make No Difference What Is Is, A Woman'll Buy Anything She Thinks A Store Is Losin' Money On.

My Idea Of Walking Into The Jaws Of Death Is Marrying Some Woman Who Has Lost Three Husbands.

The Election Is Not Very Far Off When A Candidate Can Recognize You Across The Street.

I'm Sorry To Inform You That Your 50 Year Warranty Has Expired On Your Back, Knees, And Memory. Luckily Your Lifetime Warranty On Your Heart Is Still In Effect. Of Course, That Becomes Void And Expires When You Do.